Here's the introductory video for the new Talk Topics on the new AllAccess.com v. 3.0:
I let the thing process in a blurry mobile vision because that way you don't see the bags under my eyes quite as clearly.
September 2009 Archives
I'm still learning the new procedures for work. They involve two different interfaces, and today was my day to paste what seemed like a billion topics items into the system. It wasn't too painful, if you, um, don't mind pain, and the sensation of your brains oozing out of your ears and nose.
That's where I am right now: fried. I'll be more fried tomorrow, and then there are other matters to which I must attend at the end of the week. And by that, I mean, don't expect miracles here. I'll be lucky to post anything at all.
On a more pleasant note, the Magic Number is 1. Never a doubt. (Right) Maybe the Phillies are stumbling into the post-season, but step one is to make it.
And now I gotta go lay down while Ella the World's Most Famous Cat meows all night.
Today was the day to learn some new procedures for work. I got the right applications, set everything up, got it working, and the MOMENT I got off the conference call and tried to use the new system solo for the first time, I... found a bug. Actually, the bug found me. The mere act of trying to post some writing brought my page to its knees. Just my column, though; everything else is fine.
So the computers, they hate me. Should have seen it coming.
Of course, I really needed this right now, the wholesale change in procedures and a critical bug at a time when I'm, to put it mildly, pressed for time. But that's pretty much the way life goes these days. Back to work now....
Yeah, this is breathtaking, all right. I shut down the Mac and was ready to wrap up work for the day -- I worked all day to catch up after losing yesterday to travel -- and remembered that I'd forgotten this.
No matter, though, since I'm beat from lack of sleep, the culprit for that being not the travel but the cat, who has been meowing non-stop since shortly after I walked through the door and she realized I was not the Scary Cat-Sitter but One Of The Ones Who Bring Me Food. I have no idea what she wants, other than it not being food. She laid on my legs and meowed all night. Add that to jet lag and I'm fairly incoherent at the moment.
Maybe I'll get some sleep and be more cogent tomorrow, but I promised that yesterday and look how it turned out. I'm so ashamed.
Spent all day driving and visiting and flying. And now I'm back and extremely exhausted.
I'll have something tomorrow. It will surely be breathtaking.
This week's All Access newsletter wraps up the week:
The thing I'll remember most about the NAB Radio Show 2009, other than my quality time with the 2008 World Championship trophy, came in the opening moments of the first session, when I realized that the investors who own the people who own radio are perfectly content to leave present radio management in place. Financial whiz after financial whiz chimed in with the opinion that the people running radio companies are not to blame for anything, that they've been victims of the same economic tsunami that every other Captain of Industry has experienced, that there's no reason to bring in fresh blood.
So, in essence, the past several years of trouble in the radio industry -- the troubles that came BEFORE the recession hit -- did not exist. The late-to-the-party reaction to the ascendancy of the Net and social media? The HD Radio debacle? "Radio Heard Here"? Nobody's fault. Slate wiped clean. Get Out of Jail Free. Imagine that. Moreover, the financial guys are pretty impressed with how radio companies have cut costs and trimmed fat, which translates into an endorsement of widespread unemployment. Local hosts? News departments? Why bother? You can always take a meeting with some community organizer and throw some PSAs on where paid spots used to be. See? "Community engagement," and it doesn't cost anything. And if there's an earthquake or hurricane or something, you can, I don't know, whatever, plug in some TV station audio or something. As long as it's not in your budget.
This was a convention of diminished expectations. Other than one group head's enthusiastic, probably facetious or at least wishful assertion of double-digit revenue gains for 2010, everyone else seemed to be cautiously hoping for a flat 2010 while fearing something worse; I heard more than once the sentiment that the revenue that went away is, in large part, gone forever. The great hope for the new year seems to be that since lenders clearly don't want to actually have to operate radio stations, they'll be content swapping debt for equity and thus giving the present management more time. Growth? One word: digital.
The password at this show was "digital." And you'll be happy to know that everyone in the room believes that his or her (mostly his) radio company is doing digital right. Why, their websites are just terrific -- they get over X hits a week and the morning jock has over Y followers on Twitter and Facebook! I listened to panelist after panelist touting their amazing incursions into the digital realm and I wondered if any of them had actually LOOKED at their own station's web pages. Certainly, none of them mentioned the words "corporate template," even though that's what a majority of stations' websites are all about. And there was precious little recognition that the Internet is a different medium with different usage and opportunity to do things more than just streaming or podcasting the same old stuff, although more than one person noted that maybe using HD multicast channels for variations on the same music formats isn't going to entice people to buy and use HD Radios. That goes for the Internet, too. To be sure, there ARE people here who have a good handle on the Internet. Most of them are working for Internet companies.
And the issue of aging also came up. Everyone agreed that radio is getting older and older, and it's true: More than ever, this was an Old Guys In Suits convention. It's not that young people hate or don't use radio; The numbers say otherwise. But they don't grow up dreaming of being on the air anymore. Nobody has an answer for that here, although I like the idea of turning HD Radio channels over to kids to do whatever they want with them. Nothing hooks people on doing something better than letting them do it themselves. But that isn't going to happen.
So I'm emerging from this thing without a clear idea about radio's future, because the people here didn't seem to have a clue about that, either, other than "digital." At least they know about the Internet now. It's a start. And any trip that includes cheesesteaks at Jim's, dinner in the courtyard at the Palazzo at Schmidt's, morning runs on East River Drive, forays into Reading Terminal Market, an abundance of Tastykakes, and an appearance by the Phillies' trophy is just fine with me.
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Somehow, I was able to continue to update Talk Topics all week. That, of course, is the show prep column at All Access News-Talk-Sports, and it's got an abundance of material for your show, with new items added all the time. There's no time for the usual jokey reap of what's in there, but rest assured that if you're stuck for ideas, you'll find what you need right there. Also available for your reading pleasure are "10 Questions With..." Fox Sports Radio "Myers and Hartman" co-host Steve Hartman and the rest of All Access which this week gave you the most extensive coverage (and, for the most part, the only same-day coverage) of the NAB Radio Show, plus all the other resources you've come to expect of the industry's leading website.
Speaking of which, changes are afoot. You'll see what I mean soon enough. It's the good kind of change, too. You like shiny new toys, right?
Okay, it was worth the trip.
Well, that was uneventful.
There was a roomful of old guys in suits this morning, and they talked about how tough things have been but how good things will be, and how the present management of radio is just fine and the financial guys are happy to leave them in place because it's not their fault after all, see, because every business is hurting these days, and pay no attention to the fact that radio was in free-fall way before the recession. Pay no attention to the men behind, and in front of, the curtain. They've absolved themselves of all blame.
And then there was a panel of talent that didn't really say much, and a panel on digital something or other that was so stultifyingly boring that I forgot it WHILE it was going on. And in between, the new NAB President and CEO came out and made a speech that was pretty much the same speech given by the guy he's replacing when that guy was hired, a speech that showed not even a little understanding of the industry's problems. He's a politician, so that's what you get.
And I gotta run. More coming up.
Long day, a lot of miles covered. Details tomorrow.
As of noon Monday, the L.A. Times' top stories, as selected by the public:
No, we're not in any trouble at all.
And now comes the busy week. I've got double duty Monday, bad timing because I have to head to the NAB Radio Show to cover that the rest of the week. Time is at a premium, and that's when I'm getting a lot more work thrown at me. I can multitask, but there are limits, and nobody seems to understand that.
So I have to keep some control over things. One is that the posting here will be daily but light. Can't be helped. I'm sure you'll be able to handle it.
P.S.: We shall not speak of the Eagles' performance today ever again.
P.P.S.: "Mad Men" got a bit bloody tonight, didn't it? Wasn't expecting it to become a splatter flick.
Too exhausted to even write about USC losing to Washington today, so... let's play Password!:
Yes, the title's in honor of the 2008 World F'ing Champions as they coast into the 2009 playoffs. (And with that, the ghost of 1964 pays a visit). This week's All Access newsletter is about using a down time to shake things up. Radio could use a sparkplug right about now. Do J-Roll or Victorino have any spare time?:
You know, now would be a good time for radio to take a few chances.
That's not how it works, of course. Management is, with good reason, freaking out over business, which is, to put it as charitably as possible, difficult. They're panicked over every dollar. And there's the omnipresent, omniscient PPM telling them, they believe, that your ratings go down every time you say a word with more than two vowels in it. No wonder that a large percentage of present radio management would prefer you shut up and play music, preferably all hits, preferably "Poker Face." Maybe "Boom Boom Pow" or "You Found Me" for flavor. And commercials. Assuming there are any commercials.
But you can't do that with every station, can you? (Can you? Please say no) At some point, there has to be recognition of the fact that radio needs to try new things.
Why not now?
A year ago, when the economy collapsed, some of the wiser financial minds noted that recessions are actually good times to start new businesses if you have the money (that, unfortunately, in this credit market, is a little bit of a problem). The theory is that if nobody is doing well, you're not under pressure to make the kind of returns you'd be required to show in a go-go market. You can make your mistakes now, and, by the time the market recovers, you're well-positioned in your category and the sky's the limit.
We can relate that to radio. Right now, we're in a weird transitional period. Revenues are obviously down. The PPM has changed things on the measurement side, and has programmers and advertisers trying to adjust. The impact of new media on younger demos is being debated. The world has changed. Yet radio today isn't a lot different from radio 20 years ago. Talk radio still means, mostly, political talk or sports talk. That's not to say they're bad. There are a lot of good political talk and sports talk stations out there, AM and FM, but ten years ago, when All Access took a chance and let me start the News-Talk-Sports section, I was looking forward to the day when there'd be a wide range of spoken word formats. By now, I thought we'd have stations all about, say, home improvement or food or travel or advice. We'd have comedy stations and financial stations -- not brokers selling you their services but serious market coverage -- and stations geared toward younger listeners' interests and stations talking about nothing but pop culture, scattered across your FM dial.
We got a lot of that stuff, but not on radio. Check your cable dial. And podcasts and streaming audio and satellite, too. These are opportunities, and terrestrial radio's not seizing them. Even presented with the opportunity of "multicasting" on "HD" radio, all we got were personality-free jukeboxes. And niche or unusual programming ends up relegated to off-hours on the weekends and sold at dollar-a-holler rates even though other media seem to be able to sell ads on entire websites and cable networks for the same niches.
This, however, seems like a great time to try this stuff out. Traditional ad spending is down, and down a lot. The usual categories are cutting radio budgets way down and sending some of the money to the Internet. Stations that don't have dominant ratings in their demos are going to be hurting for a while. If revenues are going to be off anyway, and if you can look at other media for success stories where products find a niche and sell narrow but lucrative audiences like travel buffs or foodies or investors, shouldn't radio be looking at the same thing?
Okay, so I may be way off here. Maybe there'll be no business to be had for that kind of programming once revenue starts to grow again. But I'm looking at the Internet and cable and I'm seeing that they find value in specific targeted niches, and meanwhile there are whole general demographics that talk radio doesn't bother trying to reach, as if they're not worth the trouble.
Right now, radio can't afford to ignore any possible audience. Wait much longer and the window of opportunity will be closed. And if the third or fourth or fifth FM station in your cluster is sucking wind trying to pull in the crumbs left by the bigger Top 40 or Country station in town, and someone else beat you to putting a talk station on FM, maybe there IS room for a different type of talk. It didn't quite happen in the first ten years of All Access News-Talk-Sports; maybe we'll see it in the next ten.
(Oh, and if there's not even a traditional talk or sports station on FM in your market, what the heck is everyone waiting for? Let's get that done right now, okay? How many examples of successful FM talk do you need to observe before you take the plunge?)
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No matter what brand of talk you do (look out, here comes the plug!), you'll find plenty to talk about at All Access News-Talk-Sports' Talk Topics show prep column. This week's pile includes the shocking news that soda makes you fat, another nail in the coffin of telephone landlines, the trouble with Shorty Smoothe, taxing dogs, a dangerous spork, another reason to worry about going under the surgeon's knife, the slow and painful death of the daytime soap opera, how Congress is seeing the world on your dime, an amazing true science story in which a tooth replaces an eye, why the guy threw a lot of golf balls all over a national park, why people are driving carefully when they see the POLITE pull up on a motorcycle (that's not a typo), overweight pets, the now-celebrated Ernie Anastos F-bomb and the one where the little girl throws the foul ball back at the Phillies game, why it's hard to be the world's tallest man, and much more, including a ton of stuff about the economy (mostly severely depressing, of course), the Yale murder, Kanye West, and everything else that happened this week, all chosen with talk radio in mind. There's also "10 Questions With..." John Kobylt, the John of KFI/Los Angeles afternoon hosts John and Ken, last interviewed here exactly ten years ago, and the rest of All Access with the usual news, columns, charts, and resources that make it the radio and music industry's leading resource... all free. And there's a lot more coming, very soon, in the new All Access Version 3.0, chock full of improvements. No, that doesn't mean they got rid of me.
Next week, yes, it's time for the Incredible Shrinking Convention, 2009 edition, in Philadelphia. If you're going, do say hi when you see me. I'll be the guy downstairs eating his way through Reading Terminal Market.
Just... wow. (NOT SAFE FOR WORK!):
I can see this being the new "Have a nice day."
HT: Daily Telegraph
So, everyone tells me, if you have to get up at 3 am for work, and you don't have time to take a nap, why don't you go to sleep earlier? Because I need to have a life, I tell them, noting that work often doesn't end until well after dinner. I need at least an hour to unwind. I sometimes get less than that. And, either way, I'm looking at six hours of sleep, tops. That, according to every research study ever done, is not enough. Maybe I should try going to bed earlier, I said to myself last night. Sure, I'm plenty tired. Let's try going to sleep earlier.
That... didn't work out so well. At least, no better than the usual.
The problem starts with the time of year. Going to sleep when it's still light enough out to get around without lights is just weird. Going to sleep when the Dodger game is in the second or third inning is equally weird. It's like being jet-lagged on east coast time, but I don't live on the east coast.
And then there's the fact that I'm now in a strange cycle where I'm consciously awake at least once an hour. I have distinct memories of looking at the clock all night, something I always do. I look at the clock, puzzle over it until I can read the numbers, and quickly calculate how much time I have before it's time to work. I do this hourly, and in the last hour, it's every 10-15 minutes. I'm resting, maybe, but I'm not sleeping.
With all of that, the extra couple of hours I gave it last night had the net effect of leaving me... feeling exactly the same as I did the night before, and the night before that, and so on back to when I started on this early morning schedule, well over ten years ago. That would be tired. Also, feeling like I should be living in Leisure Village and queuing up for the early bird at the deli. I'd tell you to get off my lawn, but it would take too much energy.
Oh, did I mention that I don't drink coffee? I really need to reassess my life.
Hold on, now.
With the economy in the toilet, you have a lot of educated, experienced workers looking for whatever work they can find, including retail and customer service opportunities, right? Right.
And that means that for the usual low wages -- $8 to $10 an hour, even -- stores and companies can snag smart, capable people for all positions, right? Right.
So... why is customer service even worse today than it was before the downturn? I mean, why am I getting stuck on an interminable line at the drug store checkout while the clerks bumble and chat their way through each transaction? Why did the local grocery replace its experienced, longtime, familiar checkers with new folks who seem to have trouble with everything? Where are the smart people?
If we have a large, older, experienced, available workforce out there pretty much desperate for work, there's no excuse to have people who seem to have zero aptitude for the job at the registers, behind the counters, taking your phone calls. Call a bank and see what you get from the CSRs these days. Go to the post office and see how that's working out. Customer service is curt, indifferent, and often incompetent. Yet there are people who could be doing it better, available right now.
Maybe, as Fran mused today, the employers want people they know won't bolt the moment a better gig comes along. Maybe she's right, and companies don't want to commit to train and use someone when they'll have to do it over again soon. But, in this economy, there are plenty of people who aren't looking at finding that "better gig" anytime in the foreseeable future. Why not use them? Why not give your business the best customer service you can? Seems worth the risk to me.
But that's not what's happening, so the queues at the check stand are getting longer. Nobody is around to help you, or they don't know how, or they don't want to. When the economy gets back to some semblance of normal, some customers will remember the "service" they're getting. I guess the companies don't care.
My time is limited this evening, so here are a few quick observations:
1. The Swayziest Swayze is "Road House." Not "Point Break": The Swayzeness is counteracted by the Keanuness. Go with "Road House." More Swayze than a TImex commercial.
2. Jeff Garcia? Is this a flashback?
3. Myers, Madson, or Lidge... hmm... you're sure there's no other choice? Please? Is Tom Gordon still around?
4. Really, "Road House." Crow T. Robot agrees.
5. Yes to the AFL throwbacks in tonight's Bills-Patriots game. Love the AFL unis. Except for the Broncos brown and yellow, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.
6. Something about Matt Barkley bothers me. It's his look. Kinda Malfoy as a frat dude. He looks like the kind of BMOC that I'd have hated had I gone to a college with frats and football. I didn't, so the dislike is irrational, but it's there.
That was almost Larry king-like. All it needed was the dots.
In the mail the other day:
I think I know why, too.
Because he passed away five years ago.
That might just have something to do with his not answering the previous letters.
You might want to back off the whole scolding-him-for-not-sending-you-a-donation thing, National Committee to Preserve Social Security and Medicare.
Thanks.
I'm a little too busy to write much here. But, hey, the Posterous page has a few new pictures, including a brief and far less exciting than real-life video from that day early in the Station fire when the dust devils showed up. I finally got stuff to post from my cell phone, so there it is.
Go check that stuff out while I ponder how the hell the Phillies are in first place and have won 80 games with that bullpen. After Myers and Madson today, and Lidge all year, right now, it's, um, not gonna work, not in October.
This week's All Access newsletter is about not choosing the same side every time. Kind of:
Blah blah blah healthcare blah blah blah speech blah you lie! blah blah insurance socialism blah whatever. Blah.
I know, that wasn't exactly what talk radio sounded like this week, but it may as well have been just that for a lot of people. Talk radio tends to serve the committed, ideologically committed core audience well, and that's fine. Gotta serve the P1s (I hate that jargon). There are a lot of folks in this business -- perhaps you -- who have done well by sticking to an ideological or party line. I'm not arguing against that, or the idea of an all-conservative or all-liberal station. If it works for you, that's great. And in many cases, it works just fine.
But that leaves a lot of people out, too. I'm not talking about people who identify as "moderates" or even "independents." I'm talking about the vast majority of folks who don't think of themselves as anything. Oh, sure, if a pollster asks, they'll pick a side, and when they register to vote, they'll often choose a party. (Remember the first time YOU registered? Did you declare yourself a member of your parents' party? I knew it!) They're not apathetic, they just don't obsess on the political. They want to know what's going on, but they want their interests to be represented. They're not averse to talk radio, they're not totally passive, but they're looking for answers and they're frustrated by all the politicians. Who's talking for them?
More to the point, whose interests DO you represent? I mean, besides your own (and the sponsors, and the station)? As I mentioned, some hosts put party or ideology first, but I'd like to hear more hosts represent the listeners' interests first, foremost, and always. Call it populism or whatever term you want to use, but I think there's a vast audience out there for talk radio that puts the listeners' interests above all else. It's not "conservative" or "liberal," it's knowing what your listeners want and need and giving them talk and action to that end. A lot of shows ask listeners to trust one side and hate the other; too few have a healthy distrust of both sides or call to account everyone in power, whether Democrat or Republican.
Healthcare is a great example: The arguments have broken down along party and idological lines, but I would argue that most people, confused and put off by all that, just want someone to do something about high insurance costs, huge co-pays, the way insurance companies exclude so much, and the problems of pre-existing conditions and insurance companies cancelling policies after you have the gall to get sick. They may or may not want a government option, they may or may not want "single-payer," they may or may not want a free market solution, but they do want the problem to be recognized and addressed, no matter who gets the credit. That's not what I hear being discussed on talk radio all that much; instead, it's partisanship from either side, it's promotion of one party's solution and ridicule of the other and not a lot of focus on exactly what real people are facing. There's plenty of room for the "our side rules, the other guys are evil" kind of talk, but there's great opportunity for talkers who take the side of the people, too.
Again, I'm not criticizing the standard political talkers. I'm just trying to identify another market here, both local and national. I've had success with talkers who couldn't be politically pigeonholed before. I'm just hopeful that more programmers will see that there's an opportunity here. There are more than a couple of ways to do talk radio that works.
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Also important to doing talk radio that works is strong show prep with a wide range of topic options every day, and... hey, look, it's Talk Topics, the column at All Access News-Talk-Sports with lots of material you can use every day! What a coincidence! Why, this week alone, you can find hundreds of topics there, items like job discrimination against the obese, the jobless recovery, what not to pack in your carry-on, the perks of being a state legislator, the perks of having "ugly" friends, some unusual and frankly disturbing personal proclivities, bad news about jobs, more bad news about jobs, a ton of bad news about jobs, the return of Steve Jobs, pooping cats, robbers with sinks on their heads, an alleged mobster allegedly spitting in a cop's face, a brewery where brewers spit into the beer, and much more, plus "10 Questions With..." longtine talk radio executive-turned-consultant Gabe Hobbs with the lowdown on his new operation Gabe Hobbs Media, and the rest of All Access with the latest industry news, job listings, columns, ratings, charts, and resources, all free.
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One more thing: Eight years ago today, I was exactly where I am right this moment, in this office, in front of the computer, in shock and confusion, and I won't forget it. Of course, nobody else will forget where they were or what they were doing, either. On 9/11, radio came through with some amazing, compelling coverage, from news departments to morning shows to talkers. Here's hoping that we never see a day like that again, but that, if we need it, the radio industry is still able to offer the live coverage, information, and humanity that marked that day.
I've gotten about 30-40% through my column, and it's already late, so... I will exercise my prerogative as my own editor and sleep on it to be finished tomorrow morning. I've already missed most of the football game, though. There'll be plenty more, I guess.
The column... hey, at least I have a topic now. It took me most of the day to come up with one. That's always a good sign. Not rushed or half-assed at all. Nope.
You'll see. Tomorrow.
My sister Joan sent me an article from a local paper in North Jersey. The article is about a frozen pizza. That's not the whole story.
Well, actually, as far as the article is concerned, that IS the whole story, a local brand of frozen pizza only available in that region. (The article's online here). The brand is Tree Tavern, and it was a regular in our home throughout our childhood. That's mildly interesting, and I found myself wondering if it tastes the same (you can't get it here in California for a taste test, alas).
But, as I said, there's more. Tree Tavern was not always just a frozen pizza. It was a place, an actual bar and restaurant in the heart of downtown Paterson, New Jersey, and when we were kids, Joan and I used to love to go there for dinner. It was down near the train station, near another favorite place, the Market Street Spot, where we'd go on Saturday nights to read through comics and papers while waiting for the bulldog editions of the Sunday papers to come in. The Tree Tavern was, if my memory is at all functional, a squat white joint with the name in script neon across the front of the building. There were two rooms, at least for dining, the front room and a large room to the left rear; the front part had red booths.
The cuisine was red-checked-tablecloth Italian, and, frankly, I don't know if it was good, because I was in single digits and I would have thought stuff from a can was fine (if, that is, it satisfied my picky appetite). Joan reminds me that she went for the meatball casserole, topped off with a parfait (the pronunciation by Joan of which amused our father no end for reasons he took to his grave). I think I would always order pizza, although I do recall spaghetti at some point, and copious amounts of crusty bread. Mom, Dad, Joan, and me, chowing down at a Jersey Italian joint in the mid-1960's... if there's a memory that sums up mid-century suburban family life for me, that's it.
And there was the bathroom sign. The men's room had a glowing, backlit sign up above that mesmerized me. It had the silhouette of a monocled man and the word "GENTS" in large, narrow letters. It was probably from the 1920's or 1930's, but I didn't know that. All I knew is that it defined "old" to me. It looked like it was a message from an earlier time, a time before me. It scared me a little. I couldn't stop looking at it.
It's gone now, of course. They tore it down a long time ago. But for Joan and me, the place is still around, somewhere in our minds, occupying a bunch of brain cells, serving up red-sauce platters the way we liked it when we were kids and the future was limitless.
And the pizza has a Facebook group. Perfect. Of course I joined.
The title, of course, refers to the line from a particular episode of the historical documentary "The Flintstones," in which a Tuesday Weld surrogate confuses everyone with her name. I was similarly confused today, proceeding through much of the day under the mistaken impression that it was Monday.
It wasn't.
But you know that. So today was occupied by forgetting to do some things and doing others that I didn't need to do. I took some video and can't get it from the camera to the Mac without error messages galore, so my grand plans for today's post did not pan out.
Oh, and it's too late to call, but, Joan, I got the article. I'll call tomorrow. Thanks - I love ya! Yes, there will be something here about the 'Tavern coming soon. All will be explained for the rest of you in due time.
I work on Labor Day so that when hosts make it to the studio early in the morning for Tuesday's show, there'll be fresh material. So that's what I did today. I worked. And washed the car, which is also work, sort of. And while I worked, I watched the Phillies lose to Houston again.
Another "vacation" in the books. At least I got to sleep in (until 5 am, which is late for me). Got some good runs in, too. I could use a "real" vacation with no work and no obligations and sleeping until, oh, I don't know, 6 or 7 am, but that won't be happening anytime soon, so this is going to have to do.
One curiosity, though. I rarely remember anything from my dreams; I wake up and they're gone. But this weekend, I did remember one dream. I dreamed of eating cookies. Not just any cookies, but those huge almond-flavored "Chinese cookies" you get at New York delis and bakeries, the kind with the dollop of chocolate in the middle. In my dream, I was happily devouring a Chinese cookie, and I was in mid-chew when I woke up to find...
... no cookie. I had no cookie. Just some flavorless cereal. Disappointing, to say the least.
Story of my life. Someday, I'll get that cookie.
The second (and last, really) day of my "long weekend" involved sitting around Borders reading books, then going home and working a little. And then I turned on the Jerry Lewis telethon.
You can't fault Jerry for having gotten old. It's remarkable, actually, that after everything he's been through, he can still do this. But the telethon is the last bastion of the kind of entertainment that ruled television in the days where most people could only get two or three channels and "The Hollywood Palace" and Andy Williams ruled the Earth. It opened tonight with kids doing Irish "Riverdance" dancing, and then Jerry had an awkward exchange with a little girl presenting a check, with Jerry forgetting that he didn't have a mike, then making fun of the woman in the motorized wheelchair who brought him the mic ("Jesse Owens," he muttered at her, confusing the little girl, who proceeded to blow her lines). Then he sang a custom version of "Can't Smile Without You," and I had to turn away.
After that, "Mad Men": Death, roommates, Jai Alai, and the flop of the Patio commercial, plus Sal and his wife in a bedroom scene as awkward as the one with Jerry and the little girl. And then it was over, with post-mortem gloom and the Draper daughter traumatized and watching news about the Buddhist monk self-immolating in Vietnam and with that I switched back to KCAL-9 and saw Jerry tap-dancing and croaking out "God Bless America" with a multicultural, multi-abled chorus. And that sent me reeling to find a "Sanford and Son" rerun on KDOC.
Better than working? Hmm.
Today, I watched some college football until I realized I couldn't care less about anything. Then, I took a nap. Then, I ate dinner and watched some old "CSI:NY" episodes on the DVR.
The end. Roll credits.
What else do you expect? Long weekend.
This week's All Access newsletter is self-explanatory:
Ten years ago, we started the News-Talk-Sports section of All Access. Ten years ago, right about this time of September, I first sat down at the computer, stared at a blank page, and panicked.
Some things never change.
I'd love to tell you that I knew then exactly what this thing would become, but... I don't remember WHAT I was thinking. I can barely remember last week. So, instead of looking back, I'd rather look forward.
Some thoughts about radio's future:
1. I don't think radio's dead. But a few more format changes that result in more-music 10,000-songs-in-a-row commercial-free stations that sound exactly like every other more-music 10,000-songs-in-a-row commercial-free station and I'm willing to reconsider. I'm not against music radio, but there HAS to be another way to do it, and I'm a little tired of hearing stations debut and thinking that I've heard this before. Creativity doesn't mean "do exactly what someone else did in another market."
2. The continuing wildfires are testament to news and talk radio's value, especially when one could turn on the TV at the peak of the danger, with the TV stations' own towers endangered by the flames, and see... infomercials, network sports coverage, and old movies. And on the Internet, there was... sketchy information mostly gathered by "old media" reporters. If you were looking for a medium where the coverage was extensive and always available, around the clock, radio was the only one, and, unlike the Net coverage, you could follow it while packing your entire life into the trunk of your car and evacuating your home. There's continuing value in that, however it's delivered to you.
3. Can we all just stop panicking over PPM results? I hear conclusions being drawn from every release of numbers, and the result is that there's a lot of "conventional wisdom" being acted upon that might not be wisdom at all. Shut up and play music! Last week's numbers show that you lost listeners when you breathed, so don't breathe! It's not working in another market, so let's change it here! Meters favor demographic A! Except where they don't! Seriously, maybe it's time to step away from the numbers for a few days and relax.
Hey, come to think of it, this IS Labor Day weekend... so, let's cut things short and start barbecuing and parasailing or whatever you do on your long weekends. I wouldn't know about relaxing. I tend to work through the weekend. But you go ahead and enjoy, and we'll think about ratings and formatics and topics next week, okay?
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Rest assured that when you get back from the weekend (and even if you have to work through it), All Access News-Talk-Sports will be serving up the show prep four out of five talk hosts recommend to their patients who chew gum, Talk Topics, which has... well... lots of stuff this week, from the poor cat with the arrow through its head to lots of wildfire and health care stuff, plus a never-ending parade of really odd crime stories and stories from the recession front lines. You'll also find out why some teams are doomed to never make the baseball playoffs, read about the 12 year old drunk driver, and discover plenty more material for talk show and morning show use. While you're there, stop by and read a 10th anniversary "10 Questions With..." consultant Walter Sabo, a guy who had a major influence on my radio career and whose ideas and opinions are still as provocative as ever, and check out the rest of All Access with the industry's best and fastest coverage, columns, ratings, job listings (yes, there are still jobs out there), and all the other resources you need, all free.
Oh, yeah, before I go: This thing would never have gotten to the ten year mark without the support and incredible vision of Joel and Ria Denver. I probably don't thank them enough for creating AllAccess.com, for having the foresight to establish a true home for the radio and music industries on the Internet before anyone else, for building the site and encouraging creativity and, most of all, allowing me to work from home so nobody has to actually interact with me in person. That's worth some sort of humanitarian prize. Also, thanks to the entire All Access staff, who create all the great material you see on the site, thanks to the advertisers you see here and on the site -- please click on the ads and check them all out -- and, of course, thanks to all of you for your support and encouragement.
Okay, now, go have a great long weekend. I'm gonna go get started on the next ten years.
I'm unavoidably delayed with the column this week. It'll be here tomorrow.
Hey, we had another fire around here, but they put it out in an hour. The firefighters in Southern California are pretty impressive, huh?
I'll be doing a tenth-anniversary column tomorrow. It'll be the tenth anniversary of the launch of All Access' News-Talk-Sports section, the tenth anniversary of my going full-time as a guy who works on the Internet. It's a good thing, especially in light of how radio is going as a vocational choice. I'm happy working for a great boss at a great company.
One of the things I like the most about doing what I do for a living is that it's a creative thing. I needed that. For years before that, I felt that people in the industry treated me as a suit, a lawyer (which I am), someone who could implement strategies but couldn't come up with them himself. When I moved to programming, I was determined to prove that I was even better as a creative force, a talent. I think I did that in radio, in programming, in producing, in being on-air and behind the scenes, but I was reminded today that for some people, I'm still a suit.
It was when I was talking to a friend, someone with whom I have worked closely over the years, and he made a suggestion for the future. "You know what you should do? You should be an entertainment lawyer."
Gah.
I've spent the last 24 years edging away from that. I'd have to re-learn a lot and shell out for the bar review courses and take the exceptionally difficult California bar (my New York and New Jersey bar memberships are sadly not reciprocal here), and the law biz isn't exactly booming; there aren't a lot of jobs open right now. (My friend noted that I was talking myself out of it; fair enough) And, moreover, I LIKE writing. I LIKE writing and producing and performing. I think I do it well enough to continue doing it, with the hope that there'll continue to be someone out there interested in paying me well for what I produce. I'm not saying I wouldn't do a suit job, I'm just saying that I think I'm more valuable doing what I've been doing... for the last... ten... years.
Ten years. Vocationally, they've been good years. Maybe I should have remained in suits and working my way up the law firm ladder, but I don't think that was ever going to work for me. I'm still a lawyer, officially, and I'm still someone with plenty of corporate management experience. I don't hate that stuff, but after almost 20 years on the creative side, I gotta think that this way was, inevitably, where I was meant to be.
I could be wrong. I could be horrible at this writing thing, or the radio thing. If that's the case, don't tell me. I like the delusion. And I'm going to keep at it.
I would be happy to show you pictures of the soot clouds over Palos Verdes and the tumbleweeds and the aftermath of the weird weather event I experienced this morning that coated me in dirt and featured swirling winds that looked a lot like some sort of tornado, but I can't. The pictures are on my phone. I can't get the pictures off my phone. I can't find my card reader, and the phone has decided not to allow me to send e-mail, period. This is after it decided that only some addresses should get e-mail. My plans, they have been thwarted by the very technology that should have enabled them in the first place.
Have I mentioned how much I can't stand Windows Mobile 6.1? Or the HTC Touch Pro, which has now melted the matte soft-touch coating on the battery cover and seemingly refuses to turn off battery-killing Wi-Fi? I have SO had enough of this piece of crap phone, but it will be too expensive to replace, and Sprint doesn't offer anything else worth switching to (the Pre ain't it yet). And I can't go to another carrier because of signal issues here.
Arrgh.
I still don't know what that weather thing was, though. It was a massive, long gray cloud that looked like a fat slug with swirling patterns at the edges, and it kicked up tunnels of dirt, carrying a lot of tumbleweeds across the road. And I was at a particular point in my run where there was no shelter and nowhere to hide. Heat, fire, and now random weather aberrations.
I love California. I really do.
