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Yeah, I'm watching the Oscars instead of working, which doesn't make much sense considering I have no interest in who wins or loses or to be preached to about global warming by Al Gore.

What's striking me about the show is how it reflects, well, the past. Hollywood's still laboring under the assumption that it matters to everyone. But to someone growing up now with movies really sucking and so many other choices, the highlight of the evening had to be the commercial for the iPhone. Clint Eastwood and "Happy Feet" and stupid dancers forming patterns behind a screen? Not a chance.

Which is to say thst I'm far less interested in Hollywood congratulating itself for the stuff that's least representative of its output (a point entertainingly made by Joe Queenan in an L.A. Times piece this morning) than I am about my friend Joe switching from a PC to a Mac. I saw several of the nominated films and performances, and I've already forgotten many of them. Computers, I remember.

On the other hand, I work on computers all day, all week, all year. So if watching an interminable smugfest affords me a break, I'm all for it. Just don't expect me to care a whole lot. And, for God's sake, don't expect me to sit through "Babel."

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Really tired, long day, got nothing, and then I saw on a Times of London blog a link to this:

Cats That Look Like Hitler

And I laughed a lot.

(No, Ella the World's Most Famous Cat does not look like any dictator. She just IS a dictator. In her own mind, at least)

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What do I do when I have no time? That's right- it's back to the scanner.

Spring training is a cool thing to see if you happen to be in Florida or Arizona. Especially Florida. In Arizona, it's modern parks amidst the sprawl of Phoenix, and it feels a little too slick and major-league. In Florida, even at the newer parks, it's still a little slower, a little more relaxed. And in honor of the onset of spring training, here's the entirety of a scorecard from March 31, 1975, Pirates vs. Mets at Al Lang Field in St. Petersburg, FL:

It's a small, plain scorecard on moderately heavy white paper stock, one fold, and it's not in the best shape (I cleaned it up a little in Photoshop). It doesn't look like 1975- the design, the graphics, the ads look more 1950s or even 1940s. The map's interesting- as far as I can tell, the Phillies, Tigers, White Sox, and Pirates have stayed put, although the Phillies and White Sox are at different physical locations within the same towns. The Dodgers are still at Vero, but only for a couple more years until the place in Arizona's ready.

The Don CeSar is not only still around but thriving. I've freeloaded... er, used the beach and pool there. (Hey, we bought lunch) Nice of them to provide a space for you to "Mail It Back Home"- I'm confident this would have fit in anyone's carry-on bag.

It's the Pirates of the 70's- Stargell, Sanguillen, Oliver, Parker, a young Willie Randolph sticking as a rookie, Dock Ellis, a rookie John Candelaria in camp, Sam McDowell at the end of his career hanging on barely, Steve Blass about to call it quits after failing to overcome the yips. How about that Hill's Air Service ad- looks like the 1920's. Derby Lane's still around on Gandy just as you enter (or leave) Pinellas County by the bay- I drive past it all the time when I'm in town

And here's the '75 Mets, a couple of years after the '73 Series. They're on the downswing here- Harrelson and Kranepool and Staub and Garrett and Grote are still here, and, of course, Seaver and Koosman. But the roster was littered with guys like Brock Pemberton and Benny Ayala and Bruce Boisclair who weren't destined to pan out as hoped. And you'll see John Stearns and Del Unser and Mac Scarce on the roster- those were the guys the Mets got for Tug McGraw, who turned out to be a bargain for the Phillies- thank you, Mets. Jon Matlack, Bob Apodaca, Nino Espinosa, George Stone, Craig Swan... the promise of a few years earlier was traded away, and while Nolan Ryan was striking out the world in Anaheim, the Mets were left with these guys. Yogi was the manager, but number 9- Joe Torre- later turned out to be good at that as well. Willie Mays was a coach, along with '69 holdovers Eddie Yost, Joe Pignatano, and Rube Walker.

Check out the Tramor Cafeteria ad: "Where They All Eat." Where WHO All Eat? Where everyone ate: it's a historic landmark. And it's still around- it's the St. Petersburg Times' cafeteria but also open to the public- and still pretty amazing. (And the food's from the grim-faced guys on the Pirates page- Orange Blossom Catering) I gotta go there next time we're in the Tampa Bay area.

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We had one of these:

I just noticed it while paging through an old TV Guide. We had that- same color, too, but without the gold stripe. The Chevette was widely considered one of the worst cars ever- "Car Talk" called it the fifth worst car of the Millenium. But ours lasted a long time. Too long. By the time the car was retired, there was no floor under the gas pedal. It was essentially Fred Flintstone's car- you got places courtesy of Dad's two feet. The A/C didn't work, it made interesting noises at all times, it was uncomfortable and ugly and began falling apart from day one. Yet, it always got you from point A to point B. I borrowed it a few times to haul stuff from home to college and it survived the New Jersey AND Pennsylvania Turnpikes.

Yes, it was a terrible car. But I remember it getting the job done, and I remember my Dad stubbornly driving it literally into the ground, and I have fond memories of it. Maybe you have a Pinto or a Gremlin in your memories. I have a Chevette.

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This, on the other hand, is genius.

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This week's All Access newsletter tries to coax radio hosts into letting listeners see their true selves, plus a gratuitous swipe at a pop icon:

This week's lecture: stop apologizing for talking about "American Idol"!

Next week: A heartfelt apology to Billy Joel, his fans, and Long Island.

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One week, January 22-28, 1977, one TV Guide:

Steve Railsback's finest moment:

Future Nuts of America!:

They dance! They sing! They embarrass! Featuring Kaptain Kool and the Kongs (featuring Michael Lembeck and Louise DuArt!), Rip Taylor, and the Krofftette Dancers!:

The powerful personality of Daryl Dragon!:

Roz Kelly, the True Hollywood Story!:

And some show with Ed Asner:

What's amazing about "Roots" to me is that you're talking about a show that had Sandy Duncan, Boom-Boom Washington, Robert Reed, Shaft, Morticia Addams, Burl Ives, and George Hamilton, and it's STILL considered great TV.

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Went to "Whale of a Day" today- that's the event they hold every year down the street for kids to learn about the ocean and ecology and stuff. Fran does the publicity for it, and it was very nice indeed.

But the highlight was this:

Everybody run!

Always nice to be a target for the Youth of America.

But boys will, of course, always be boys:

I predict big things for this kid.

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