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July 29, 2007 - August 4, 2007 Archives

July 29, 2007

A RAT, A CAT, I SAT

Oh, yeah, what did I think of "Ratatouille"? Terrific. Another Brad Bird triumph. Not really for kids, more of an adult story (despite the lead character being a talking rat- but in this movie, humans can't understand the rat, who speaks to other rats (and the audience) in Patton Oswalt's voice and to humans in the movie in panicked squeaks). Smart, funny, touching, and it made us hungry. Not for braised rat, though.

And that was pretty much my weekend- lots of work, a couple of movies, and a fresh bag of Science Diet for Ella the Worlds Most Flatu... er, Famous Cat, who will not let me sleep in on weekends or on any other day. Back to normal postings tomorrow.


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July 30, 2007

THE BASEBALL CARD CHRONICLES: PORTRAIT OF THE GENERAL MANAGER AS A YOUNG LIGHT-HITTING INFIELDER

I have absolutely no time tonight- work ran way late and inspiration was in short supply all day. So in honor of today's big NBA distraction from the gambling scand... er, trade, here's the guy who got KG for the Celtics, in a somewhat different mode:

This was a 1981 Fleer card. '81 was his third and last season with the Blue Jays, and considering he hit a resounding .187, his decision to go to the NBA was pretty easy. And while he was not a bad basketball player (whiny, annoying, but not bad), he was the butt of one of the greatest lines in "Married With Children"'s history, at least during the McGinley years:

"Ladies and Gentlemen, your NBA All Stars and Danny Ainge!"

Oh, come on, you gotta laugh at that. Even if you're Danny Ainge.


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July 31, 2007

NO, ACTUALLY, SINCE YOU ASKED, I DON'T LIKE NEW YORK IN JUNE

Ingmar Bergman died. FIlm buffs everywhere are in mourning. I wasn't a big Ingmar Bergman fan.

The newly restored vintage Max Fleischer Popeye cartoons came out on DVD today. The cartoon afcionados are wetting themselves. I wasn't a Popeye fan.

It's not them, it's me.

There are a lot of things that are supposed to be great, the best, works of genius that just don't do it for me. It's not that I think they suck, but it's like this: I know they're supposed to be great, I know they're special, I know that smart people with refined taste think they belong in the pantheon, but I... just... can't... get... into it. Bergman movies are, I suppose, best appreciated when you're in college and you take film- not movies, mind you, but film- very, very seriously. I tried. I watched "The Seventh Seal." I tried to sit through "Fanny and Alexander." They were fine pieces of work but I kept thinking, well, would I rather see this or "Animal House"? And "Animal House" won. (Lest you throw me in the philistine pile, I wouldn't say that about the true classics like "Citizen Kane," or "The Godfather," or "Caddyshack") I'm not saying that Bergman wasn't great, but that it was a greatness I'd rather concede and not have to consume. I'm just not that into it.

Same with "Popeye," the animated cartoon and the Segar comic strip, both of which are spoken of by fanboys with hushed reverence. The Segar strip was brilliant, groundbreaking, amazing, they say, and the Fleischer cartoons were unique and groundbreaking and incredible. They couldn't wait for today's DVD release. But I see the same shorts and strips they do and think... weird. And not in a good way. Popeye and Olive are deformed and unpleasant, Popeye is a simple brute with a drug-like addiction, the plot was the same in each cartoon (unlike the strip, in which the plots were more complicated with a larger cast, but still, meh), and the animation- I'm talking about the Fleischer shorts, not the awful Famous Studios stuff- was dated. Looking back, I can appreciate what the Fleischers were doing- the Koko/Betty Boop/Cab Calloway "Snow White" including the rotoscoped sequence for "St. James Infirmary Blues" is pretty cool, and available on the Internets. Also here. But overall, Popeye was no Bugs, no Daffy, not even Fred Flintstone.

But that's just me. I'm willing to defer to every movie critic in the world on Bergman and every cartoon expert on Popeye. I won't say they're wrong. But I'm not wrong, either, just... different. Can't we all just get along?


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August 1, 2007

BRIDGE COLLAPSE

I had something I was gonna write about tonight, and then this happened and all other thoughts flew out the window. Unlike other local disasters, this one can't be dismissed with "well, it doesn't affect me because it can't happen here," like earthquakes for someone in, say, Florida, or hurricanes in North Dakota. No, this is a freeway bridge -- most towns have some kind of bridge or overpass somewhere -- that suddenly, without an apparent precipitating event yet known, collapsed into the Mississippi River. This one nearly defines "it COULD happen here." This looks like the Nimitz Freeway collapse in the Loma Prieta World Series quake, but without the quake. This looks worse than the 10 Freeway collapse and the freeway ramp collapse in the Northridge quake, too. The Sunshine Skyway came down because a freighter hit it. Bridges just don't do this.

But people do just drive across bridges just like this one every single day, and there's never a thought that the thing could collapse at any minute. We drive across the only real big bridge in L.A., the Vincent Thomas Bridge (the green one in all the movies, the one misnamed the "St. Vincent Thomas Bridge" in the movie "Heat"), once in a while on the way to Long Beach or Orange COunty, and we never think, geez, there's nothing between this road and the water and it's a long drop. Next time, next several times, we will. That's the major effect of this kind of disaster on people elsewhere: suddenly, that thought will cross your mind every time you cross a bridge, any bridge.

I have WCCO-TV's coverage on right now, with the scene still horrific, thunderstorms rolling in, and a doctor at the nearest hospital briefing reporters. I feel for him; you're trained at hospitals to handle emergencies, but preparing is not the same as having to deal with it. But so far, everyone seems to be on top of things: emergency workers, medical teams, command centers are in full swing, and rescue boats and crews seemed to get to the scene almost immediately. They're showing pictures now of survivors and victims being taken off the bridge, and some of them do not look good. My thoughts are with everyone in the Twin Cities.


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August 2, 2007

THIS WEEK'S "THE LETTER": DEPEND ON IT. MAYBE YOU'LL GET LUCKY

This week's All Access newsletter wonders aloud why what used to be a given in radio is now a luxury, and how important it is that we change how we think about that:

The bridge collapse in Minneapolis prompted a few things in my mind, one being prayers for the people on the bridge and their families and for all of my friends and colleagues in the Twin Cities, a second being that this will come to mind every time I cross a bridge for a long time, and the third, most germane to radio, is that this is the time for talk and news radio to be what listeners expect and need them to be, the ultimate information source.

A lot of talk radio stations position themselves as the place to turn for information when news happens. I hear the promos on countless stations. "Depend on us!" "Breaking news first!" "The most trusted name in local news!" But some of those stations are hardly 24/7 news operations. Blame cost cutting and management's inability to accept the importance of radio news, sure, but if you're a PD, that's on you, too. If you want the top news position, you have to insist on having a well-appointed, professional news operation, not outsourced but your very own. You have to lobby for it, and if you have it, you have to protect it from the cost-cutters. And if you don't? An emergency happens, people in their cars tune to your station, and... you're talking about something else. You're in syndication, or on tape, with nobody to break in for coverage. Or you're carrying some TV station's audio, and the descriptions are inadequate. You need news made for radio. You need your own feet on the ground at the scene.

You also need local hosts ready to go on the air immediately and make sense of the situation. You need to put callers on the air to tell what they saw -- every TV station's soliciting home video and cell phone camera material, and callers are the equivalent for radio. And you don't have to wait for anything to upload -- it's instant.

And it shouldn't stop there. What does your Web site do in cases like this? If an emergency happens and someone goes to your Web site, what will he or she find? Your program schedule? A bunch of ads? Some third-party-generated entertainment news headlines? You need to get news up there, audio and video, too. Radio cedes this position to the local newspaper Web sites and TV station Web sites, and it doesn't have to be this way. If you're trying to be the news leader, you need to be exactly that whenever and wherever a consumer comes looking for news. Just streaming won't cut it. It's too much work? It's a new age, and it's what you have to do.

What? All this costs money? Why, yes, it does. And if corporate doesn't want to spend that money, I'm sure they'll have a good story to tell the Senate panels about their commitment to localism when the folks on Capitol Hill start looking into ownership consolidation again. (What goes over better in Washington, having to try to explain Minot again and again or telling the legislators how stations across the Twin Cities dial covered every angle of the bridge collapse?) And I'm sure they have a better idea than I on how to differentiate the stations and make them more viable against satellite and podcasts and other new media. "Today's Hits, Yesterday's Favorites"-- yeah, that can't possibly be duplicated by anyone else.

I didn't get to hear the Twin Cities talk stations on Wednesday evening, but I understand that they all stepped up and went wall-to-wall with coverage. And because of that, their listeners will continue to turn to them whenever something's happening, major or minor. If you're not ready to do the same thing, good luck. If we've learned anything from the bridge collapse, it's that catastrophe can happen anywhere, at any time, including right in your back yard. And if your listeners can't depend on you in an emergency, you've lost your primary advantage against everyone else.

Okay, here, I usually do the plug for Talk Topics and all the weird and funny stories you'll find there for your show, but it doesn't seem appropriate this week, so I'll just say that you'll find a lot of stuff to talk about there -- Talk Topics at All Access News-Talk-Sports, ask for it by name -- and there's plenty of other great content on the site, too, including "10 Questions With..." former ESPN Radio producer Chadd Scott, who's part of a new Southern regionally syndicated show called "The Sports Tap," and, of course, the industry's fastest, most complete, best news coverage in Net News, along with all the columns, Mediabase charts, ratings (now including analysis), and other information you expect from AllAccess.com. End of plug.

Look, I'm proud of the job radio news does in so many cases, including this tragedy. I just want to know that it's going to continue to be the case. Instead of relief when I hear that stations came through in the clutch, I'd like to go back to expecting nothing less.


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August 3, 2007

ANOTHER ONE BITES THE BIG ONE

Another attempt at a talk radio network bit the dust today, this one a women's talk network. I could tell you why it wasn't going to work- and that it was "talk for women" wasn't necessarily a major reason- but nobody pays me to do so, so....

Aw, what the hell, I'll throw out one small piece of advice for anyone thinking of starting up a network: don't. Instead, launch one show at a time. Do one, get that one on a bunch of affiliates, lavish attention on it, make it work, THEN look at expanding. You aren't going to clear a lot of stations if you're trying to get them to take nine, twelve, fifteen hours of programming. It's tough enough to clear a two or three hour show, especially live. Set your sights lower, show success at that level, then build on that. Why everyone- Air America, GreenStone- seems to think you can burst out of the blocks as a full network, I don't know. I don't know who sells the investors on this concept. Doesn't anyone look at history? The biggest syndicators started with one or two small products: Premiere started with the Brown Bag Countdown (of which a station at which I worked, WJLK in Asbury Park, was an early affiliate), and Westwood One did weekly music shows. Rush Limbaugh was independently syndicated along with Dr. Dean Edell by Ed McLaughlin- no "network," even if Rush called it the "EIB Network." Jim Rome was independently syndicated by Noble, the company that operated the station he was at in San Diego. Eventually, they all got absorbed into big syndication companies, all of whom will sell you one show if that's all you want. That's how to do it. Start with one, make it work, start another. This is not difficult to grasp.

But they didn't, and that's a shame. More talk radio is better for everyone. Of course, it has to be GOOD talk radio, and that requires a different pile of my expert advice. That, I must inform you, will require an extra charge.


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About July 2007

This page contains all entries posted to PMSimon.com in July 2007. They are listed from oldest to newest.

July 22, 2007 - July 28, 2007 is the previous archive.

August 5, 2007 - August 11, 2007 is the next archive.

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